How love languages can help your relationships


G. McClendon

Helping out a friend, Owen Reynolds shows his dominant love language of acts of service by helping out Enzo Wolf with his classwork. This is one of many ways that love languages show you things about your relationship that you may not even know!

Grayson McClendon, Staff Reporter

Close your eyes and think to yourself, have you ever been asked what your love language is? The answer is probably not because love languages are not a common topic of conversation. You will be shocked to hear that this mysterious “love language” is proven to help strengthen and form relationships.

From a survey of twenty students at Millbrook, 80% did not know what a love language even was. Gary Chapman, a pastor interested in loving his wife better, wrote a book on love languages in 1995 which established five ways that people love. The five include words of affirmation, acts of service, gifts, physical touch, and quality time. By taking a thirty question quiz, you can find out your primary and secondary love language. At the end of the quiz, it will tell you how you like to be loved and how you like to love others.

Words of affirmation is the first language and the most common. If this was your number one, it means you feel the most loved through words. Receiving notes, phone calls, compliments are all ways that you would feel the most love and how you choose to spread your own. Acts of service is the second love language, and is my primary one. This is shown by doing things for others, being helpful around your family, and doing simple acts of kindness around your community. The third love language is gifts and, while it sounds greedy, it really is not. If your love language is gifts, it mean you show love by making, buying, and giving things to people you care about. This also means that you feel loved when people do the same towards you. The fourth love language is physical touch which is most common in people who are actually in a relationship. It is easy to find people who enjoy physical touch because they are the ones who are always giving hugs when they see you or high fives in the hallways. The last and one of the most important love languages is quality time, which is obviously spending time with others.

Once you find out your love language, and the ones of your friends, boyfriends/girlfriends, and family members, your relationships will be stronger. For example, if your boyfriend’s love language is gifts, surprise him with a present the next time you see him. Not only will it show that you care, but it will make them feel more loved than a note or a hug. These also work with your friendships. Junior Carter Bouchard said, “In our relationship, we are able to express quality time a lot because we are together a lot.” If you find out your best friend’s love language is quality time, invite them to get lunch with you instead of writing them a note about how much you mean to them. I know that all relationships are not perfect and they cannot all be solved by taking a quiz or reading a book, but it will help you learn something that could change and affect your relationships for the better! You will be surprised to see what a difference it makes when you know how to love on someone else! Check out THIS LINK to find out your love language, and send it to all of your friends too!